Hey April, happy to not see you again for another 51 weeks. You were a challenge to say the least. Let me enjoy your good friend May instead.
The month of April this year was a tiring one for me. So many ups and downs. So many things draining my energy mentally and physically. It has taken the first week of May to digest it all and actually write about it.
Yes it was only 30 days, but a lot was packed into the 720 hours available.
Before I go into each, here is just a taste of what happened.
- Wife was away for 12 days. Lot’s of solo parenting.
- Bank account was hacked.
- Oldest kept hurting himself at school – ie. calls home.
- Youngest had to go to doctor to be allowed back in daycare.
- Had to take care of a really silly parking ticket.
- Had to deal with an overdue bill from previous home owner.
- My dad had a stroke, had to go home to Sarnia for five days.
- Youngest wiped poop all over bathroom.
- Had to find two different babysitters.
- Snow. Yes, what the hell.
- Sick kids crawling into your bed.
- Holding in the desire to sell the boys when they pushed me to my limits.
- All the usual things – school drop off/pick up, homework, dinners, cleaning etc. etc.
- Screwing up Kraft Dinner.
I am sure I am even forgetting things because I blacked out now and then.
Making a list of it all does not really seem all that bad. But each took a lot of time, a lot of brain power and a lot of dad patience.
Obviously the big one was learning about my dad mid-month. He is recovering pretty well for the most recent update, but it did not look good for a time. My wife was literally back for like a day and I had to leave again. I had to throw my support in the ring for my mom and sister who were doing all the heavy lifting. I am glad I went, but it was nice to get back to Toronto. My piece of advice from the whole event. If you feel wrong, go to the hospital right away.
The bank hack was a crazy story and it has been resolved but again, major inconvenience. I was solo parenting without access to cash for a few days.
But there are always positives in all situations. My solo parenting made it easy and stress free for my wife to go on a dream trip with her dad. You can drool over their food photos on the blog they did. I kept it pretty chill for her in daily check ins. Nothing made it to her brain unless it was urgent. Of course it all came out when she got back ha ha.
I also got to spend a lot of quality time with the boys. While challenging, as parenting should be, we bonded over fun outings, playing in our new backyard, having kid friendly dinners (sometimes in front of TV) and a lot of laughs.
The most stressful part of the whole month was locking down babysitters for two different nights. We have never had babysitters outside of family, so it was a process. But in the end, I did find two solid ones that the boys boy liked. I also felt pretty proud of myself on this one as normally my wife probably would have managed that project.
I also got to go to a Raptors game. It was like a reward in a way for the hard work. So thanks to my mother-in-law for making that happen.
It was tiring, stressful and hard but at the end of the day it was parenting and dealing with life as so many of us do all the time. What threw me were the number of odd thing that kept popping up. It was like the heavens knew I was riding solo. It’s like the Gods knew life was getting a little too normal. I needed a shake up. I needed some adversity.
Thankfully as May rolls on, all of the April stories seem to be moving in a positive manner. So, there is no complaining there. May has been full of sun, fun and so far, nothing big except Jonas Valanciunas and his ankle. I did not even mention the amount of stress and years taken off my life due to those Raptors. But they keep rolling.
It’s all about perspective. I had a harder than normal month. It’s true. But when I watch the news and see what is happening in Alberta, I feel blessed for what I have. You can’t sweat the small things. You need to save your resolve for if and when those tragedies hit. I can’t even let my mind wander to how all those young kids are dealing with the lives ripped apart. Fortunately, they had parents who will dig deep and make it better one day at a time. That’s what we do. That’s what we should do.
So the next time you are losing your shit because you are cleaning up someone else’s shit (off the wall), remember, it could always be worse. Take a breath, keep rolling on and the next day, week or month, the sun will shine again.
But really, April, you and I need a break.